Giving Up the Touchdown
Buckeye that I am, I know what a Heisman Trophy looks like. Not that I know anything else about football...
So one morning, I had this image of myself. I was like this bronzed, frozen football player statue – striving, arm outstretched to block on-coming tackles, determined to make it to my goal. In my other arm, instead of a football, I hold a key. I have this key in my possession, but I don’t have a clue where the lock is. I just know that I have to unlock it.
It took an unbelievable amount of work to find this key. The key, is truly understanding that for all of these years, I’ve been trying to find a way to feel taken care of by forever looking outside myself - to the job, the car, the guy (or girl), the shoes (for god’s sake, at the very least).
Problem is, now that I had discovered this key, it seemed that there was this cage all around me. A giant freakin’ bird cage. I was trapped. I had rattled the bars. I’d shaken my fist in the air. I searched high and low for a way to get out of this prison so that, like the bird whose home this was, I could finally fly. For the life of me, I could not see how to get free. I finally had the key, but I could not find the bloody lock. I still felt imprisoned and unable to move on.
So I continued bashing into the bars, crashing into the ceiling, asking everyone that might possibly have an answer how to get out.
Until one recent morning. When I finally understood that all of this searching, seeking, beseeching, was in vain.
Everything I needed was right here, inside of me, running through me, emanating from me, and I've been sucking the light and life out of it. It was so buried by the shoulds and the musts and the have-tos that were dictated by my former circumstances and understanding. I'd always thought that it was over there, that thing I had to reach for, grab, hold on to. And to tackle whatever was blocking me from it.
When all the time, the Source, the overflowing lavish abundance I had been seeking was standing where I had left it. I went on this seeking journey, looking outside of myself, for whatever it was I thought I needed to fix me and all the while, that rich garden of love never went anywhere.
So, I just discovered that I didn't need a key. I had the key. I have always held it, albeit ever so tightly in my frozen, stiff, grasping fingers.
Irony is, the door wasn't even locked to begin with. Fact is, there never even was a door.
I merely needed to stop pushing. To turn around, and come back to myself.
The time is now, to walk through the gate, to return to our essence. Our all-knowing, all-providing Self that has everything we need. And always has. And we can just sit there. Or stand in it. Or dance with it.
We must know It. Trust It. Believe It. Relish It. Express It. Live It. Rejoice in It.
We have so many gifts reflected in our lives today regardless of the current insanity swirling around us. We just need to remember to stop and see them. Feel them. Give thanks for them. All we need is already here. Right here. Right now. And so it is!